Mea Culpa: How a light hearted extrovert fell into cynicism and compassionless living

A pastor friend posted a political joke on Facebook yesterday that was unkind and unchristian, but that wasn’t my initial response. In fact, I laughed and thoughtlessly posted it myself.

            Going on with my day, I became somewhat surprised when a few friends posted rebukes on my page, but many more responding with “like” and defending our right to offend with the truth.

            My original, defensive thoughts were that those offended were a little more to my left and were missing the humor, but they were people I loved and respected, so I began to wrestle with the whole issue.

            Then the Lord got right in my face, when a reprimand came from one of my key leaders (a friend, brother and a straight up guy) – “There was no healing grace in your post.”

With my intellectual & spiritual pride wounded, I deleted the post, as quickly as I could get to my computer and wrote personal apologies to those who had admonished me.

            When I shared the whole incident with my beloved, the Lord’s reproof grew even stronger. “But you’re the one that so committed to speaking blessing into people’s live.”

She was right. They were all right. What had just happened here? How could I have become so insensitive, humor at the expense of suffering? I could see Ann Coulter making the statement or even G.K. Chesterton, but the Lord whispered clearly in my heart, “Could you see me saying it?”

With love, not condemnation, our Father was clearly reminding me that, growing weary and unfocused in the fray, I had failed to guard my heart, mind and words from the prevailing cynicism of our day, within and without the Body of Christ. He also exposed the growing lack of compassion that had been emerging in my heart towards those that were not like me.

So for those who had the candor and gumption to chastise me, thank you. For those who laughed with me and defended my carelessness, I pray we rediscover the balance of truth and grace, renewing ourselves to being gracious and kind to any and all, even those with whom we politically and theologically differ.

And to all, would you pray for me, for one another and with each other that His healing grace would permeate our lives, cleansing deeply our broken places and releasing his love into the world.

“The end of all things is at hand; therefore be self-controlled and sober-minded for the sake of your prayers. Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.” – 1Peter 4:7-8