Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Charting a New Course


in an earlier day of youthful dreaming
       i ran down paths of self-centered plans
naïve, unchallenged vigor was sufficient
      to carry me through a typical day
my inward focus drove much that defined me
      even as it cleverly cloaked its existence
              more from myself
                                  than those who walked with me
but even they lived veiled in their own complacency

i marched on under the banner of western Christendom
       ignoring a higher call to come and die
there was great fanfare as others cheered me on
                   in some odd, heretical way,
                                    i was enslaved to their clamor
throwing their drachmas at my feet
         i became their champion
                paid to carry on a corporate, unholy cause

shrouded in spiritual language
       with the necessary credentials
                      the degrees bestowed by mortal man
the crowd festively gathered on shore’s edge
       to launch me in a grandly, decorated vessel
                  just below the water line - a hidden, decaying hull
chin high, chest out and a fair maiden at my side
       i hoisted anchor, waved my sword
                to the accolades of a cheering throng – and set sail

suddenly, in less than a moment
      the sound of fading applause still lingering in my ear
            the wind grew cruel, the storm came, the waves rose
my soulish, self-driven visions slipped overboard
                 and consciousness failed me
unaware of the passing of time
           i was awakened by a gentle hand stroking my head
i looked into the eyes of my beloved
                                         her serenity and love embraced me
“where are we?” i stammered
“be still.” she whispered. “we’re safe. we’re on His ship.”
        that was enough, i slept again
in the ensuing days, we held a funeral
         for the dreams of a dead man
                              and saw for the first time
       the birthing of a future not conceived of my own design

in the aftermath of shipwreck, rescue and awakening
    His healing grace revealed the impotence of my illusions
                                      the sufficiency of His presence
    and all that i considered of value cast into the depths
                    to my surprise i was not diminished but enriched
stripped of façade and false securities
       i discovered a fresh route unfolding before me
    that’s not completely accurate – it had always been there
He had designed it with me in mind
           before matter of any kind had been spoken into being

and now in this moment, dressed in fresh attire
      fashioned by trans-rational hands – i set sail anew
absent of fanfare and glitz, lighter, leaner, gentler
                                                             and greatly humbled
having been delivered from a ruin of my own making
       and the only things lost – fool’s gold & fading treasures
a fresh breeze, like hope, blew across the deck
             i clung gently & loosely those i held dear
resting in the knowing that someone, other than
           and greater than myself, had charted a new course

                                                    *mark d. cooke, 4-22-1998

* it has been many years and many voyages since i wrote these lines, and after all has passed, i can still say with Paul, "We have this as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain where Jesus has gone as a forerunner on our behalf..."   

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