Charting a New Course

in an earlier day of youthful dreaming

       i ran down paths of self-centered plans

naïve, unchallenged vigor was sufficient

      to carry me through a typical day

my inward focus drove much that defined me

      even as it cleverly cloaked its existence

              more from myself

                                  than those who walked with me

but even they lived veiled in their own complacency

i marched on under the banner of western Christendom

       ignoring a higher call to come and die

there was great fanfare as others cheered me on

                   in some odd, heretical way,

                                    i was enslaved to their clamor

throwing their drachmas at my feet

         i became their champion

                paid to carry on a corporate, unholy cause

shrouded in spiritual language

       with the necessary credentials

                      the degrees bestowed by mortal man

the crowd festively gathered on shore’s edge

       to launch me in a grandly, decorated vessel

                  just below the water line - a hidden, decaying hull

chin high, chest out and a fair maiden at my side

       i hoisted anchor, waved my sword

                to the accolades of a cheering throng – and set sail

suddenly, in less than a moment

      the sound of fading applause still lingering in my ear

            the wind grew cruel, the storm came, the waves rose

my soulish, self-driven visions slipped overboard

                 and consciousness failed me

unaware of the passing of time

           i was awakened by a gentle hand stroking my head

i looked into the eyes of my beloved

                                         her serenity and love embraced me

“where are we?” i stammered

“be still.” she whispered. “we’re safe. we’re on His ship.”

        that was enough, i slept again

in the ensuing days, we held a funeral

         for the dreams of a dead man

                              and saw for the first time

       the birthing of a future not conceived of my own design

in the aftermath of shipwreck, rescue and awakening

    His healing grace revealed the impotence of my illusions

                                      the sufficiency of His presence

    and all that i considered of value cast into the depths

                    to my surprise i was not diminished but enriched

stripped of façade and false securities

       i discovered a fresh route unfolding before me

    that’s not completely accurate – it had always been there

He had designed it with me in mind

           before matter of any kind had been spoken into being

and now in this moment, dressed in fresh attire

      fashioned by trans-rational hands – i set sail anew

absent of fanfare and glitz, lighter, leaner, gentler

                                                             and greatly humbled

having been delivered from a ruin of my own making

       and the only things lost – fool’s gold & fading treasures

a fresh breeze, like hope, blew across the deck

             i clung gently & loosely those i held dear

resting in the knowing that someone, other than

           and greater than myself, had charted a new course

                                                    *mark d. cooke, 4-22-1998

* it has been many years and many voyages since i wrote these lines, and after all has passed, i can still say with Paul, "We have this as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain where Jesus has gone as a forerunner on our behalf..."